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Wednesday, November 18, 2015

3rd Annual #NameThatButt: Round 7, Double Butt Finale BONUS QUOTE!

This is it, guys! The final round!! And I've got a final Bonus Quote for you, too -- though it might be a little bit anti-climactic if you've already determined the identification of our twin ultibutts!

(To be honest all the best bonus quote action for these two butts is in a forthcoming title -- but that wouldn't be fair quote-play!)

These butts are courtesy of Thomas G. Hale!
Please do not reuse without permission.
A horse whinnied, drawing me to the window. The messenger stood with his animal, greaves, cloak, and leather chest-plate covered in dust from the road. My brothers greeted him, looking as though they had come straight from the practice field. They certainly didn’t look like twins, but of course the priests had attributed that to parentage, and said the same again when Clytemnestra and I were born, three years later, different as moon and sun in appearance and temperament. Leda swore Zeus had been in her husband’s guise the first time he came to her. She only realized the deceit later that night, when Tyndareus himself had returned and took her to bed a second time. The priests believed, then, that fair, green-eyed XXXX had been born of Zeus, and dark-haired and olive-skinned YYYY came from Tyndareus’s mortal seed. When my brothers’ looks were repeated in Clytemnestra and me, their declarations were only made more convincing.

Be sure to drop your guesses in the comments, and if you haven't already, hit up for this week's clues, to #NAMEthatBUTT after you #NAMEthatBOOK!

But as a special treat for this Bonus Quote Finale, here's a snippet of an unedited cut scene from the BOOK you're guessing, as well! Call it Bonus-Bonus content...

Acamas brought me my evening meal, for Aethra could not be spared from the banquet without insulting the guests. I smiled and insisted that he sit with me while I ate, for I wanted desperately to hear the news from Sparta, and I had learned quickly that Acamas heard most everything in the palace. He was still young enough to be overlooked, and old enough to know all the best places to listen.

“You should have seen the horse he rode!” Acamas told me, his eyes bright with excitement and his cheeks flushed. “Black as night and taller than any in Father’s stables. It must be Poseidon’s own stallion!”

“Is XXXX not with him?” I asked, picking through the vegetable relish for the sweet peas. I saw no reason to eat cabbage if I did not need to, though it went well enough with the goat meat.

“Just the son of Atreus.” Acamas wrinkled his nose with distaste. “He demanded that Father let them search the women’s quarters, but of course Aethra would never allow it. She was offended more than Father, I think, and YYYY apologized. Menelaus is certain you must be here, but I do not think your brother believes it. He said that all of Sparta grieves for your loss, and offerings are made to Zeus each day, asking that you be returned unharmed. So many, the priests are growing fat on them! Queen Leda refuses to leave her rooms, and King Tyndareus has sent men out to every corner of Achaea, but it is rumored among the Spartans that Zeus took you to Olympus and so Tyndareus sent XXXX to Delphi to learn what he might from the Oracle.”

“Let us hope that the Oracle keeps our secret, then.” I offered him a fig and he took it with a grin.

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

3rd Annual #NAMEthatButt: Round 6 Bonus Quote!

And we're back for Round 6 with another bonus quote! (I can't tell you how much I wish I could quote from BY HELEN'S HAND for this year's #namethatbutt challenge, but alas! Maybe next year!)

Once again, if you haven't seen the clues for this week's butt, hit up and be sure to check it out.

In the meantime, you can Name This Book instead!

“You offer this bull as gift rather than sacrifice. Do you think I am so easily trapped by sacred laws? I am not a king that you can make me your guest-friend and bind me to your protection.”

“I come to speak to the father of my husband, my lord, not to the god.”

“And yet, it is the god’s favors you ask for.” His sandaled feet were tied with seaweed instead of leather, so dark a green they looked black. He offered me his hand, and I had no choice but to take it, or risk giving offense. His fingers closed over mine, warm and dry and well calloused. “Rise, daughter of Zeus, ill-gotten wife of my son.”

I did as he bid, keeping my gaze averted from his face. He wore a sail-cloth kilt the color of sea foam, wrapped around his hips and tied carelessly with thick ropes similar to those I had glimpsed on the deck of Theseus’s ship, but his chest was bare, and he stood taller than his son by a head or more. He was as brown from the sun as any oarsman, his body so thick with muscle, he made Theseus look sparely built.

“Make your sacrifice, for you surely need the god’s favor more than the father’s love.”

Drop your guesses in the comments and get ready, because next week is the DOUBLE BUTT finale!!

Wednesday, November 4, 2015

#NAMEthatBUTT Round 5

No bonus quote this week -- but please do head over to and check out the clues for this week's #NameThatButt round!!

While you're waiting for next week's games, you'll find me (beginning tomorrow!) at World Fantasy Con in Saratoga Springs, NY, and I'll have Butt stickers and Butt magnets, for your amusement, along with assorted bookmarks, postcards, and whatnots. I'm not on any panels this year, but if you see me, I'll be thrilled to say hello, and my Amalia Dillin books will be on sale in the dealers room at Flights of Fantasy Books and Games!